Does your attitude really impact your success… and how much?
At a business networking event I met a man, we’ll call him Bill. He seems like a nice, smart guy with some level of success. And, he’s negative. He talks only about the problem. His response to solutions that are offered is that they won’t work and it’s just the way it is, more problems. Life is the way it is and he just has to deal with it and it’s not working. But that’s just the way it is. Here’s how Bill’s attitude made a difference in his life.
Bill has a great business idea. He has a unique and interesting marketing/advertising product that he wants to take to Bentley… but he doesn’t know how to get in touch with them. He doesn’t know his next step or how to get started, and shoots down ideas.
Sitting across the table from him is a woman who is very connected in the car world. (Me! I love classic cars. I was recently driven around the countryside in a friend’s 1927 Bentley. Sweet! I know car guys.) With a phone call or two I could introduce Bill to the right people. Those people would not only be willing to talk to him, but knowing my friends, they would also help him succeed.
But, with his negative attitude, those steps are a chasm because: 1. When I even talked about it, Bill shot me down. He told me what wouldn’t work and why. 2. I’m not going to introduce him to my friends with that attitude… and even if I did, his response would probably be to tell them, these very successful and supportive entrepreneurs, why it wouldn’t work and to complain about all his problems, versus asking them for help and a solution to those problems. It’s like the sales person that says to potential customers, “You don’t want to buy this, do you?” and then wanders around saying that selling their product isn’t possible.
I tried to talk to Bill about his negativity but he doesn’t believe all this positive attitude stuff. He doesn’t “get” how it can make a difference. He doesn’t see that his attitude is not only keeping him from the financial success of his product, it’s keeping him from meeting amazing, successful people that could help him change his life.
One of the major things I do as a professional development coach is work on attitude and the belief in possibility. The above is an extreme case but most people think their dreams are impossible. They aren’t. It’s just a limiting belief. Maybe it sounds like this… “I’d love to do _____ but I’m too ______.” You fill in the blanks. I hear it all the time. Dreams are squashed before they’re even attempted.
When my clients start believing the dream they have may be possible and they start talking about it, the results are miraculous. I thought about using a less woo-woo word but they are miraculous. I often find myself in awe of how things can completely turn around and what they accomplish in a week… if they just believe that maybe it can, and start talking about what they want and taking the next indicated step.
If you’ve been stuck in any area of your life, let go of the being stuck, stop talking about it and thinking about it. Focus on and talk about what you want… the solution you desire. Start thinking about who you may know and who they know that might be able to direct and connect you. Don’t complain, blame, criticize, minimize or maximize the problem (and don’t hang out with others that do that either). Decide that you will win. Do whatever it takes to get your self positive; study success, do affirmations and practice thinking positive thoughts, learn, be around positive people, do a gratitude list. Do whatever it takes. Decide that you will go for it and do it, whatever it takes, take action. A change in your attitude can take you from failure to success… your attitude impacts your actions and the actions of those around you… those impact your results.
By the way… your attitude is a habit and like any muscle. The more you use it, positively or negatively, the more it will grow and the easier it will become to use it either positively or negatively. It’s not outside of your control… it’s a choice.
It’s not the economy… it’s your life. Make a choice… dig in, get messy, go for what you want, decide it can be, talk to others about your dream, and take forward action… go for extraordinary because any other choice sucks!